Like I think I’m so used to my depression that it’s just normal to me so I’m like “do I really need the pills?” Because idk the way I am just feels so normal for me. Even though I don’t think “normal” people feel this hopeless idk if they do then life just sucks.
And I’m also just scared of anti depressants and I feel shitty about taking them bc of all the negativity surrounding them. Like first of all the horror stories about bad side effects, and then I sometimes see things about them that just make me feel like a bad person for taking them. Just ugh.
And I know I probably need to talk to someone. I honestly think that might help the most. I need a professional to talk to, but hell I just need someone to talk to. I feel so lonely all the time, but idk even if I had the opportunity I just feel like I would stubbornly not talk about anything, and I think it’s because I’m trying to protect myself or something? I have a really hard time even just seeking help out, or even just talking about myself in general. Like my dad made an appointment for me to go talk to the doctor about my depression because I kept saying I deserve to die and that I’m constantly miserable, he set it up for me, and I don’t think I would have done it by myself; I’m horrible at looking our for myself, and that’s just sad. But god sometimes I feel like I can’t keep going unless I can finally tell someone some things that I keep to myself, and that maybe just maybe that will help me heal from everything.
do i really need anti-depressants tho
do you ever just listen to someone’s problem and you have nothing to say except “I’m sorry” because there is literally no way for you to help and you get sucked into a vortex of guilt and despair because you are useless
the real nyan cat
this cat knows the secret to life but he doesn’t think we deserve it. look at that grim face.
"I can’t save these people"
A gem from the car museum.
Ezra Koenig and Steve Buscemi talk about the status of New York City for AOL’s Park Bench
"Even in Master And Servant no sex is mentioned and it doesn’t put women down. If you interpret it as a heterosexual relationship the woman is the master. In "Somebody" I’m saying this is what I want and these are my terms but still presenting it on an equal basis."
if you have someone in your life who genuinely cares about how your day went, and listens fully to the fucked up shit that goes on in your mind, and answers your texts or calls you back, and lets you know you’re important to them and/or generally makes you feel cared for, you’re really fucking lucky and i hope you tell this person you appreciate them and i hope if they treat you right and make you feel safe and loved, you hold onto them really tight.
you said I was gonna be a mermaid